Crew Blog

Hello SpongeBob fans! Thanks for coming to the new SpongeBob.com website and even more thanks for checking out the crew blogs. I hope you’ll have a good time exploring the website while you eagerly await the next SpongeBob episode (that is what you’re waiting for right? RIGHT!!!??).

For all the people reading this blog (thanks for the support Grandma, I loved the brown sweater you knit me), my name is Philip Harris and I am a Production Assistant on “SpongeBob SquarePants.”

At this point you may be wondering: Did I finish that salami sandwich or did I put it back in the fridge? Ok maybe that’s what I’m wondering. You may be wondering what exactly it is that a Production Assistant on “SpongeBob SquarePants” does?.

Well, I’m glad that you asked…well actually, since I have no idea if you asked, I’m merely glad that you read that last sentence in which I assumed that you asked. Anyway, before I get into what my responsibilities are, let me first list some things that Production Assistants never, ever do (cannot be proven in a court of law):

Make prank phone calls to the Creative Director’s home phone every Saturday morning.

Accidentally use an original Season 1 drawing to make a paper airplane.

Sign a secret alliance with Plankton to take over Nickelodeon Studios….no not me….woo ha ha ha ha ha….cough cough….(they know too much).

Ok, ok, back to the job. After being a proud member of the SpongeBob crew for nearly a year, I’ve known for at least the last week what a Production Assistant does. Right now you may be thinking that perhaps a Production Assistant in some way assists in the overall production of the show? To that I kindly say: Wow, what an understatement!

Let me explain: What a Production Assistant really does, is help people. I mean, we’re really there for our crew. For example:

When a layout artist is afraid to walk back to his car because the parking garage is dark and he swears he heard strange noises, I will be there to lead the way (stay strong Kenny).

When a writer says, “Me have idea, bring me stones so I may chisel idea into rock,” I will be there with tablet in hand.

When a prop designer is feeling lonely and just wants a hug, I will be there…to direct my lonely cast mate to the Human Resources department and hope for the best.

When my boss Alvaro says “Philip, for the last time stop writing that silly blog and make me those ten copies,” I will say...thanks for reading and see you next time!